There are times I feel like I may have made a mess of things. Other times when I’ve taken on projects big enough I have doubts about my ability to survive them. Sometimes I feel like I just need to stay in my own little comfort zone and recover from the outward world and focus on self and family for a while.

Going back to work outside of my art has certainly pushed some envelopes for me. Stuffed them full to the point of bursting, in fact. As a self-employed person for whom the job is half volunteer and half paid (volunteer 20 hours (sometimes more) and get paid for just 20 hours), I’m discovering that I must be careful about insisting on my private time on Sundays and Mondays and part of Tuesdays.

In any case, the outside work which I’m really enjoying because it also allows for a lot of creative thinking and problem solving; is physically demanding and I’m deeply and honestly tired when I get home. I cannot even conceive, at this point, of approaching the easel in the evenings. But Sundays and Mondays seem to be working out alright. I’m not producing a painting a week (and definitely not a painting a day), but I do think I can complete a painting a month, at least.

And here is the latest. I asked my husband, Ken, for a title suggestion and he suggested “Tomato Paste”. Seemed to fit just fine. The tomatoes are from last summer’s garden (I’m working from a photo staged on our kitchen counter) and an antique canning jar I had hanging around the house.

I realized I really needed to get cracking on these painting as I’ve sold another in this series this week, leaving me only a very few. It felt good to get back to work on my real job, painting.